Updated: Sep 19
1. Realize your interpretation of people, their actions, & intentions are mostly due to past interactions with pain & processes we’ve adopted to protect, deflect, fight, or run away. We must learn to back away & access ourselves.
2. Pain always leads to processes we implement to deal with people in CASE; pain jumps out at any point. The problem is, those processes weren’t garnished by the direction or fruit of the Holy Spirit, so they caused damage & harm to the outcome Hod intended.
3. We feel (because we’ve “had” to for survival) we have to fight for respect, boundaries, & love. Fighting is mostly just how we approach certain situations & people we feel need backup of our compensation so they don’t make another example of us….
4. The result is “Personalities” we have allowed to form out of fear or personal protection mechanisms rather than an agape mindset. Jesus is always trying to lower a bridge so people can walk over. Time & time again. Yes, they blow these bridges up, but He keeps inviting & so should we. If we are honest, fear results from most of our blow-ups, blowouts, & relational casualties.
5. Success in this season is the determination to communicate Christ instead of having others honor the ways we have grown used to. It’s the ability to honestly appeal to our senses to asses how we approach others, react, or enter situations. Having Christ’s character doesn’t mean we bow. It just means we don’t take offense.
6. Emotions are never intelligent. We think our triggers are discernment, but maybe it’s just places we were incapable of forming proper & healthy interpretation skills of circumstances or people. The smartest people, most educated, skilled, experienced, etc., consistently get into more pain, loss, or relational explosions because we can’t assess ourselves honestly.
Yes!!! We are fearful & wonderfully made, but NO, the flesh side or our ways weren’t fabricated by His Spirit. Just by us trying to climb out of pits of pain or feeling alone to deal with things. We must remember that our version of the story may not be intelligent but may be emotional.
7. Needs-based personalities are only because of inner depravities from our pasts of pain. We don’t NEED even those closest to us to do certain things for us IF HE TRULY is our source. He’s our real source. David cried out to the Lord on multiple occasions & then GOD renewed His strength, not others.
8. We wrestle not against flesh & blood (Eph 6:10, Luke 23:34, Jonah 4:11). Although leadership, accountability, etc., is STILL needed, the offense isn’t needed to go along with it. That’s most of the problem. If we can TRULY (it’s possible) begin to see who the enemy is, we will have more compassion, love, & patience & save more crucial relationships. This is the foundation of having grace with folks. They truly don’t know. If they do, they are still deceived in doing so.
9. We are in a war. Principalities use personalities. Only the enemy knows where we haven’t dealt with our expectations or triggers & sends people to keep attacking our destiny, our ministries’ destiny, & families. Yes!!! God’s things can be taken out by these things. Adam was a God thing, but because of flesh, he destroyed it. Marriage is a God thing, but men destroy it. Church is a God thing, but men destroy it. Jesus tried to do miracles, but men’s unbelief messed it up, so no mighty miracles could be done in His hometown, so this is crucial!
10. Crucial conversations- they say 85% of all surgeries go wrong. Nurses knew the doctors were wrong but DIDN’T KNOW how to talk or were afraid! People die because we won’t relearn communication & de-escalate situations or stop things from progressing. The most crucial relationships are those we treat the worst due to dealing with issues inside of us. Expectations or triggers in us are all the same. Nobody owes us anything! We should seek the Lord to truly see wholes in our armor.
Love you guys!
